jpierrepontcriss: my mom was pulling into a parking space today and she asked “am i relatively straight?” and i said “i think that’s something you need to decide for yourself” and she told me to walk home
fuckyeahblackcelebrities: smokewithmirrors: i needed this on my blog lmfao omfg
starksfell: making fun of one direction is the best part of the one direction fandom
anthonygherkins: If you can’t concentrate in school because the mere sight of a girl’s bare leg is too much of a distraction, you are probably a danger to society tbh
nahlou: there are hannah montana lyrics for whatever life throws at you
chemicalcatastrophe: bahboh: one thing i love about college is that everyone is so exhausted that nobody judges anyone for sleeping anywhere like just rest your eyes get comfy we’re all in this together you are safe here it will be ok And, my favorite, the humble music major.
rebeccacrane: you know what’s cool when you’re so used to a certain person’s voice that you can imagine them saying anything even if the person has never said that before
realising that we’re almost halfway through the year 2013 and i have literally achieved nothing
dootzy: this video will make your day better
senpai-has-noticed-you: sometimes i think i’m arrogant but then i remember that julius caesar was kidnapped by cicilian pirates and when they demanded a ransom of 620 kgs of silver he got mad because he thought he was worth more than that and made them raise it to 1550 kg
"Those swimmer's you like are too old for you. You...
me in 1st grade: wow swearing is so bad i won't ever swear
me now: pass the motherfuckin salt you fuck
Not gonna lie I spend 86% of my time imagining different scenarios in my head
sashafierceee: beyoncespenis: DRAGGED ME TO CHURCH It was so great!
fuckoff-mondays: When you listen to a song you used to listen to ages ago and you get that weird as fuck spine chilling feeling as you remember how your life was at that point in time
gothicstan: gothicstan: gothicstan: i just gave a stranger on the internet my address so they can buy me pizza my foLLOWERS ARE THE EBST??? OH MY GOD LOOK PIZZA my mom saw the pizza and she knows im broke and now shes really mad and im grounded
When people are telling me about their wonderful...
sodamnrelatable: on the outside, I’m like : on the inside, I’m like:
zaymmaliks: SOMETIMES I WANNA BE A WHORE AND DO DRUGS JUST TO SHOW MY MOM HOW MUCH WORSE IT CAN BE THAN JUST LEAVING MY DIRTY SOCKS ON THE FLOOR
hateruess: yo fuck anyone who doesn’t want you in their life and fuck anyone who treats you bad and fuck anyone who breaks your heart because they’re all fuckin losers and they’re definitely not worth your time because your time is precious and the only people who deserve it are people who treat you right and are nice and don’t lie to you and buy you ice cream.
lesmiserablespenguins: frazerhines: i don’t want to spoil anything but harry is a wizard DAMMIT! I DIDN’T GET THERE YET!!
I like drinking coffee alone, and reading alone. I like riding the bus alone, and walking home alone. It gives me time to think, and set my mind free. I like eating alone, and listening to music alone. But when I see a mother with her child; A girl with her lover; Or a friend laughing with their best friend; I realize that even though I like being alone I don’t fancy being lonely.
justinibiebers: stuff you ask your mom: mom where’s my towel mom what do we eat for dinner mom what time is it mom where’s my phone mom when do you come back mom what day is it stuff you ask your dad dad where is mom
dogs420: i’d hate to be an actor in a movie where a dog dies because you know everyone would rather have you die than the dog